One Homeschooling Peril

Although I am sure there are more homeschooling perils, one in particular sentences me to the Pit of Despair (rasped out in an appropriately ghoulish voice, a la The Princess Bride): doubt.

Let me attempt to clarify.

My ultimate goal is to provide the very best possible education for my children. Since all children are individuals and are blessed with different strengths and challenges, this may look different for each child of mine. Fortunately, both of my scholars enjoy books: reading on their own, my reading aloud to them, or listening to books on CD. I love all those things as well, so I joyfully settled on a literary-based educational philosophy for our family.

This worked well for a few years. Then Miss Priss began fifth grade, and doubt crept in. I became convinced that we were not doing enough. So I made some changes. We followed them for several months, but the going was tough. We were hard pressed to finish everything scheduled for a day, and I felt overwhelmed and ineffective. This past January, I thought long about the changes I'd made and why I'd made them. I talked with a homeschooling friend of mine, and we discussed ideas, reasoning, and options. I prayed for guidance. And peace.

I know I'm not the only homeschooling parent thus plagued. With the myriad choices on the educational buffet, it's easy to get bogged down, not only in the details but in the bigger picture, too. Spiral or mastery for math? Do we need a formal spelling program? Should we try a hybrid school? What about an online school? Is a four-year history cycle better than a six-year cycle? Shouldn't my child be doing (fill in the blank) by now? Are we going to need a tutor for math? Latin now or later (or at all)? What about lab experiments? Am I completely ruining my children's chances for success?

Homeschooling is a passion for me. I take my role very seriously. This is a good thing, but I also feel the heavy weight of responsibility on my shoulders. Are the choices I'm making the very best ones for my children? Doubt about this question can make homeschooling a burden for me.

Here's what I learned: my focus was out of whack. I'd been viewing my children as tabula rasa, buckets to be filled with educational matter. Wrong! In The Great Conversation, Robert Hutchins writes: "The result of liberal education [is that the student learns] to read, write, speak, listen, understand, and think." Note he did not say "to regurgitate a bunch of meaningless facts in a vacuum."

Joy in learning should also be a goal of mine for my children, for them to "find knowledge so delightful that it becomes a pursuit and source of happiness for a lifetime," as Charlotte Mason writes. My job, then, is to provide a wealth of educational opportunities, a wide-ranging banquet for their minds; to create an atmosphere rich with intellectual pursuits that spark their interests and natural curiosity; to give guidance and help where it is needed, but not take over; and to stimulate discussions of ideas and impressions.

With that in mind, I've given lots of thought to our long-term plans, and I've back-tracked somewhat. I'm convinced that a literary education is exactly the style in which my children will flourish. And I'm committed to fostering a love of learning in their hearts and minds. I'm sure doubt is not through with me yet, but my recent struggles have helped me to see our destination more clearly and to better map out our path for getting there.